Thursday, November 4, 2010

A pending goodbye...

Here we are at 31 weeks. Sometimes I feel like I got caught in some sort of fast-forwarded time warp and poof! here I am.
We got some pretty upsetting news this week that most likely Greg will be deploying to Afghanistan for one year sometime next fall. I couldn't help but cry thinking about all that my husband will miss of our son's life during that year he will be gone. What hit me the hardest is that he'll miss our son's first Christmas and his first birthday.
Of course, we're a military family and we know that there's always a chance that something like this can come up. But, we've been married for eight years now and he's never been gone more than six months. Now that we're finally on the verge of being parents after all these years, the orders come down. I might have known it would happen this way.
I guess the blessing is that our son won't remember that his dad was gone for a year. But, my husband will, and it breaks my heart to think about it. And, of course, the prospect of a year without my husband is very daunting.
And, now there's a whole host of things we have to do to prepare for this deployment and many big decisions have to be made. I can't imagine staying here for a year without Greg, being that I don't have any family or close friends here. So, we will have to sell or rent our house and the baby and I will have to move back to NC. And, then when Greg returns, we'll have to move again.
I don't want to sound like I'm whining about this -- this is part of Greg's job, one that he chose for himself and families go through this all the time. We've been very blessed that we haven't had to do it before. But that really doesn't make it any easier and the timing just stinks.
Physically, I'm starting to feel some of the pregnancy associated misery I've heard about from other women. Specifically, I have heartburn at night that sometimes wakes me up so I keep the Tums on my night table and that does seem to help. I've also had some pretty painful leg cramps. I had one in a muscle I didn't even know existed and I've even had them in my feet. Hate it. It's also more difficult to get comfortable at night even with various configurations of pillows. Another new symptom is my least favorite -- many mornings I have a couple of hours of feeling like my heart is beating too fast and I get sort of short of breath. I've talked with my OB about it and he thinks it's just due to the increased blood volume and the upward progression of the uterus.
While telling Dr. Carter about my episodes, he laughed and said -- "You're really feeling pregnant now! But I think you asked for this. I mean, you wrote a few checks for this."
Yes, yes I did. And, I'm not complaining, just explaining!
My weight gain this visit was back within the normal range and our baby's heartbeat was very strong at about 136 bpm. And, our doctor said the baby is growing like a weed. This was NOT news to me!
I swear somedays I can feel him growing. On Monday for instance, I woke up one size and went to bed much larger. All the materninty pants that my niece gave me are starting to fit quite snug (her prepregnancy weight is much less than mine!) so I'm almost certain I'll have to go buy some things in the near future. I hate to spend money on clothes I'm only going to wear for the next two months, but being comfortable is pretty important these days.
We had our epidural class (mandatory at our hospital) and toured the labor and delivery department on Tuesday night. The same "lunch lady" from our breastfeeding class was our tour guide and once again she said many off the wall things but it was nice to get to see the ins and outs of where we'll have the baby.
We start our birth classes tonight and there's no telling what this crazy woman might say.


  1. Oh Krista, I am so sorry that your DH will likely be deployed next fall. I cannot even fathom just how difficult that is think about, prepare for, etc. All I can say is that so much can change in such a short amount of time so just try and live in the moment (yes, so much easier said than done I know) and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy (minus the heartburn and cramps) and look forward to your little bundle of joy arriving. I understand that you now have this cloud over you but hopefully the sun will shine through more days than not. Hang in there sweetie. (((Hugs)))

  2. Krista-

    I can't even imagine how difficult it must be to think about your husband's deployment, particularly with your son on the way. Your husband will most definitely be in my prayers during that year.

    My friend who is 4 weeks from delivery is also complaining of a racing heart. not sure if that makes you feel better or not? :)

    Late pregnancy sounds pretty damn uncomfortable, frankly!

  3. Oh Krista I'm so sorry to hear the news you guys have received, I cannot imagine how difficult that is to process and then all the preparations. Will be thinking of you guys and sending love, I know this is probably hopeful thinking, but maybe things will change by then and he won't have to go. A girl can hope right?

    Oh, the leg cramps I remember those well! I had horrible leg cramps often during my pregnancy. Sounds like you're enjoying all kinds of "fun" symptoms...I would be the same way though, tell the doctor everything just to be on the safe side.

    Thinking of you and sending love ((hugs))

  4. It is going to be so difficult to have your husband away for so long so early in your boys life. I couldn't imagine having to go through that. It's good that you will be able to get closer to family during that time, I'm sure the support will be quite helpful.

    Leg cramps really are terrible, I have that problem too! And my feet are soar in all sorts of strange places. It's all for the baby though, right?

    Good luck with all of your crazy lady classes!