Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Feeling better, sort of

I'm feeling better, I guess. No more stomach problems, which is nice. But a dark cloud of worry has settled in over my head since I had that horrible cramping on Thursday night and I can't seem to shake it.
I'm OK during the day but at night I have these terrible dreams and I wake up certain that something horrible has happened in there. I am counting the days until the ultrasound on Friday. Sometimes, I wonder - would I feel this way if I had conceived naturally with no problems? I don't know. Maybe it's normal for every pregnant woman to worry. Maybe I worry more because I'm always waiting for someone to deliver bad news?
Speaking of bad news, my husband got some news yesterday that I am still trying to digest. At his annual dental checkup, the doctor noted that an old root canal probably needed to be checked. So, yesterday he went to meet with another dentist who does all the root canals at our base. Apparently, during the original root canal in 1994, the dentist noted that he lost the tip of a file during the procedure and couldn't find it. He assumed he irrigated the debris out during the procedure. Well, most likely, that tip has been lodged underneath my husband's tooth for nearly 15 years and on the newest films, the dentist can see two black spots that are either a) pockets of bacteria formed around this debris or 2)cancerous lesions. So, of course, we are pretty scared. Greg will go in at the end of July for the first of several procedures in which the dentist will try to determine what we're dealing with in there and how to best go about remedying the problem.
Just my husband's luck, he has never smoked or used smokeless tobacco and here he is faced with the scary prospect that he could have cancer growing in his jaw. Oh and let me say that this has been there all this time and Greg is required to have an annual dental check up and no one has ever noticed this problem until now. Makes me wonder about the dentists who have treated him in the past.


  1. I am so sorry to hear about Greg's dental tests... And I did have some weird stomach cramping when I was on the suppositories too now that you mention it.

  2. I'm glad you are feeling better. Know that no matter how you concieve, there is still worry, at least i know there is in BLM's and IF's world. I have cramping on and off throughout and when i talked to my nurse she told me to drink water which i have done and that usually clears it up. Sometimes it stops on it's own. But i think we will worry until our babies are safe and in our arms. I pray that you began to feel even better throughout this week and your appointment goes well. I also pray that everything is alright with your husband. How devastating and scary this must be for you both. Sending you hugs, love and prayers.